My sister

As the majority of you know, I am a worrier, and when I can't figure something out, it gives me huge anxiety.  Which is why, in the very early stages of this pregnancy, I literally had crippling anxiety worrying about if my sister was going to be there when the baby came.  I finally had to call and basically say "I really need you to be there."

With Liam, I had this entire birth planned out with me and Jeremy acting as a team to get this baby out.  I didn't want anyone else there, it was to be a time for me and him because we had trained for it with the Bradley classes.  Although it went exactly as I had planned, it never crossed my mind what we would do the first 24 to 48 hours postpartum.  The first hour after Liam was born was terrifying. We had already discussed if something happened with the baby, Jeremy would go with him. We didn't discuss what we would do with me.  Cue my sister... She was there, right when I needed her to be, helping me pump for the first time while Liam was in the nursery before he was transferred to the NICU. She was there with me to help calm me, to help me to the bathroom, to help me shower the next day, to go with us to the scariness of the NICU, to take our first family picture.

Although I needed her, it wasn't it Wyatt's birth that I truly appreciated how much I really NEEDED her.  With Wyatt's birth, I wanted her to actually be there.  We had been there, done that with the team  fields and I wanted her to be there this time to see.  But, because I had no idea I was progressing so quickly, when we left for the hospital, I told her I would call after I got checked. At that point I was thinking I was likely only a few centimeters dilated, and didn't want her to drive in the middle of the night when it could be several more hours.  Needless to say, when I got checked, 10 centimeters, 100% effaced and Wyatt makes his appearance at 18 minutes since walking into th hospital, she didn't make it to the birth. But she was there in a heart beat, and helped me through the shock. Listened to me say the same thing over and over again.

And the most important part.... That night... She stayed up all night. The entire night. Holding hthe baby. Waking me up to nurse, then holding the baby.  Jeremy was completely dead to the world, and I was in shock/ delirium and couldn't get my mind to stop working to get restful sleep, but in not position to hold the baby all night because I was so exhausted.  And Wyatt wanted to me held... What newborn baby doesn't? He needed a heartbeat and a cuddle and warm chest, and between my sister and I, he got that.  I don't know if my sister knows how much I appreciate that night, or her helping me again to take a shower the next day, but man, I couldn't have made it past those long hours without her.

So, fast forward to this birth.  I very selfishly need my sister. For me, for the baby.  I know she will be there when I need her and she will provide pure unadulterated love to the baby when I am a basket case postpartum.  She will cuddle and kiss and appreciate tiny fingers and little ears and wisps of hair and change tiny diapers while I recover physically and emotionally those first few hours post partum.

Thank you Rebecca for being there for me.  Thank you for moving your vacation so that you won't be away around my due date.  Thank you for driving in the middle of the night, for staying up all night and for loving me.

I adore you and am so thankful you are going to be there. There is literally no one else I trust enough, or want that could even come close to taking your place. I love you.